FC: 3969 - 5007 - 3672
《 十一月 2013 》
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090214 (12:22AM)


Hideaki Anno drawing flipbook at university.
From japanese TV drama Aoi Honoo (Blue Blazes).

090214 (12:07AM)
083114 (11:28PM)
082614 (11:52PM)
❝I go through phases. Somedays I feel like the person I’m supposed to be, and then somedays, I turn into no one at all. There is both me and my silhouette. I hope that on the days you find me and all I am are darkened lines, you still are willing to be near me.❞
— Mary Kate Teske  (via fawun)

(出典: hellanne)

082614 (10:46AM)
❝Sadness gives depth. Happiness gives height. Sadness gives roots. Happiness gives branches. Happiness is like a tree going into the sky, and sadness is like the roots going down into the womb of the earth. Both are needed, and the higher a tree goes, the deeper it goes, simultaneously. The bigger the tree, the bigger will be its roots. In fact, it is always in proportion. That’s its balance.❞
OshoEveryday Osho: 365 Daily Meditations for the Here and Now (via ding-ang-bato)

(出典: feellng)

081614 (9:49AM)
❝The first generations of “academic artists” hit NY in the late 70′s to late 1980’s. I can tell you that very, very few of those artists were still making work in the late 1990’s and even among the successful ones,only a small handful are still making art today. Why? Because it is very hard to sustain any kind of real personal dialogue with art, if you come out of school and start making your own work right away. There is no period of failure. No striving to develop the true inner dialogue on which art is based. What one ends up dialoguing with is success and recognition. The all important period of developing your own vocabulary which is best done in the shadows is truncated, starved.Instead what one sees are people copying what seems to work for other artists and this is a betrayal to ones own budding vision, which cannot be rushed to fulfill some ego based need for recognition. There are many of examples of people who got that recognition early, shows, tours and grants from age 26 on who are empty and artistically exhausted by age 39, just at the moment that ones own vocabulary starts to naturally coalesce.❞
Letter To A Young Artist # 1 Penny Arcade (via photographsonthebrain)
052814 (7:09AM)

ONE OK ROCK in Toronto 2014 by omae-ni
"We speak different languages, we are from different backgrounds. But because of music we can meet each other."

My entire existence is still trying to process everything that happened two nights ago. My body is still extremely sore from the disaster of a mosh pit, but I’ll leave out those negatives because I want this post to radiate good vibrations and a message. Words can never measure up how much I love this band, but I’ll try my best to collect my feelings into this.

I entered high school in 2006 - 2007 with this band, their first song for me being 「エトセトラ」。Around the same time, ELLEGARDEN was slowly nearing their indefinite hiatus, so it was surprising for me to discover another group that impacted me that much as them. To this day, I still have a special place in my heart for ELLE, but that’s a can of worms for another day. Anyway. They’ve managed to get my adolescent self through some tough times along the way. I’ll save you my oh-so-tragic sob story, but to simply put it, I was sinking into such a terrible place that… I eventually abandoned music entirely. Does that have people questioning my loyalty as a fan? Probably. But sometimes depression can do that. It painfully tears you away from the things and people you used to love, and I can assure you that losing touch with this band was excruciating enough. Man, this is going in a different direction than expected.

However. Once 2012 made its entrance, everything changed.

During the summer of that year, a few months after I was released from the hospital, I reunited with someone I now consider a close friend, Cai, and found a brother in a then-stranger, Saturn. Although our original plan was to have a tiny photoshoot, we ended up spending the entire afternoon talking about things that revolved around the topic of bands; one them including Saturn meeting with ONE OK ROCK during one of his trips. I’m not sure how to explain it, but listening to him sharing his experiences was nostalgic, like hearing about an old friend I haven’t met in years. You can bet your ass that when I got home, I decided to “catch up” on what I’ve missed out on… needless to say, I fell in love with them all over again, haha. I fell so hard to the point where I spent hours crying while listening to their discography, because every song had something I needed to hear.

This is going to sound incredibly cheesy, but I think finding them again was a definite sign for me that things will get better, after everything I went through during that part of the year. At that time of my life, I saw myself as a weak, insignificant person, a burden to everyone around me. I thought to myself, “I should have died back then, there’s no hope for me”. There was no one in the world I hated more than myself. So when hearing your inspirations play songs about enduring hardships, that everything is going to be alright, it sinks pretty deep into your heart.

It’s thanks to these four dorks that I’ve come to love and appreciate the second chance at life given to me, that I’m constantly working on making myself a better person, and that I can have a healthier way of thinking. Jeez, I’m tearing up just typing this out, and I’m sure there are people laughing or looking down on me for the things I’ve done. But I’m not going to let that chain me down anymore, and these four dorks have helped me realize that I’m a constant work-in-progress.

And now this brings me to May 14th, 2014: the day I finally got to see them perform before my very eyes. 

I’m going to be super honest here, and say that it was my first concert experience, and I feel accomplished that these guys were my first. In fact, it was all sorts of “firsts” for me, from buying a band t-shirt, to screaming at the top of my lungs without a care in the world. Hell, I got water baptized on the cheek by Ryota. Again, going to leave out how chaotic the mosh pit was, but thankfully I am the sturdiest & most patient person out there, so I survived my first pit, albeit not being able to move my arms much… explaining why I didn’t get to take many pictures during the performance, sadly. I did, however, manage to record part of “Wherever You Are" (the link is right there) before they ended off with "NO SCARED"!

It’s hard for me to put the actual concert into words, because it went by so quickly, and I was completely awe-struck by everything. The opening band was fantastic, but I’m embarrassed to say I forgot their name. They were really good for their first time performing in front of a large crowd, so I’m happy for them! The second the crew started setting up for the boys after they left, I was shaking in my spot, but once the famous Red Mic made its appearance on the stand… oh boy, was I going nuts. I can’t say I was “lucky” to be so close to the front, but at the same time, it was exciting seeing all of this happen so close.

Lets talk about the guys, though. Taka was obviously as charismatic as fuck, he really knows how to conduct the flow of energy in a room with that stage presence of his. His English is also noticeably improving, even though he didn’t speak very much of it. And don’t get me started on his voice, because he has such great control over his vocals, he sounds just as good live as he does in CDs! I’m not even kidding. For Ryota, the best way to describe him is “dorky beast”. He kept sticking his tongue out and making the craziest faces while he played, but my god, was he rocking out harder than anyone I’ve seen in person. I’m glad I was on his side of the stage to witness this happen, it was hard to stop feeling the music whenever I looked at him. Toru was obviously looking chill as always, I honestly can not believe that someone could pull off this combination of mature x rockstar sort of appeal, yet he did it flawlessly. Then again, this S-class cool attitude is expected from the leader, right? With Tomoya, my core literally shook with the beat. I’ve always enjoyed how hard drummers worked, despite being in the back, and he looked so passionate playing that it had me smiling whenever I got the chance to look at him.

They were absolute perfection, and subtracting the pushing, I want to relive this live again. The bruises and sweat were totally worth it. There was this very wonderful feeling of togetherness from the crowd when we all sang along with them, and honestly, it’s only something you can understand when your love for a band is mixed in with people who are just as enamored with them as you are. Can I just… go back in time and relive it? As impossible as it may be, I’ll definitely make a playlist of all the songs they played to get me through life until the next concert. One thing’s for sure: I will never forget that night for as long as I live. I made new friends, managed to reunite with old ones, and had the experience of a lifetime. After all, you never truly forget your first love.

If I ever do get the chance to see them in person, I’d probably drown the entire area in tears for how grateful I am to them, and how proud to see how far they’re getting in their lives. They’ve influenced me in so many ways, and may have potentially saved my life. I’m really glad I’m alive today, so thank you ONE OK ROCK.